20 Things Moms Say To Their Kids……Sooner or Later….

When I was growing up I always said I would never have children.   I have been a babysitter since I was 12.  I was a mother’s helper to a nice lady when I was 14.  And although I worked with children and liked children I always said I did not want any.

I don’t remember why I said that, I just remember saying it.  So much for the memory huh?

Well, then I met my children’s father, and somehow I just knew that I wanted children with him.  My biological clock may have been a factor also, as I was 29 when I met him, but I am not sure about how much that influenced my decision.

Recently I realized that as a mother, I have said things I swore I would never say.  And have become my mother (in a good way).  So for all the moms out there, here is a list of things we say that make no sense, or sound strange, or could be taken COMPLETELY differently in a different context.

Things Moms Say

–  “Can I get that boogie out for you?”

–  “Wow, I didn’t know baby boys had morning wood.”

– “I brought you into this world and I can take you out” (always hated that one, but found myself using it)

– “Please don’t pull on your brother’s penis” (said when they were little and I bathed them together)

– “Please don’t drink that milk, I worked very hard to make it and it is for my baby.”  When I stored small bottles of breast milk in the fridge at work while pumping.

– “Why no, I have no idea what that smell is.” (I actually said this when I had cabbage leaves in my bra to help dry up my breast milk after pumping for 9 months. Cabbage doesn’t smell too great when it gets warm.)

– “If I step on something and break it as I walk across your room, too bad so sad.  Maybe you should pick it up.”

– “Because I said so.”

– “Stop talking please, I can’t hear myself think.”  ummmm, okay??

– “Someday you will understand”

– “When you have kids, and they do what you are doing now, I am going to laugh my ass off!!’

– “As long as you are under my roof you will follow my rules.” (Anyone NOT said this????)

– “God gave you a brain, use it.”

– “Look it up.”  (or these days I say “google it.”)

– “Don’t call me unless someone is bleeding or needs to get stitches.”

– “You want to run away? Can I pack your stuff for you?”

or for my crabby days:

– “You don’t want to live here anymore?  Okay, you go the way you came, so leave naked.”

– “Let’s play the quiet game.”

– “I am not asking, I am telling!”

And one I think I may have been the only mom to say: (as I was standing upstairs and my 17 year old was running his mouth).

– “If you don’t stop talking I will jump over this landing ninja style and rip your throat out.”

He stopped talking!

Did I miss any????


One thought on “20 Things Moms Say To Their Kids……Sooner or Later….

  1. When my stepson does something particularly stupid (he’s nearly 17–it happens), I’ll say, “Is your brain in backwards?” Maybe not the nicest thing to say . . . but lordy, can he be exasperating!

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