I Don’t Care About 50 Shades of Grey!!

Okay, I have a confession to make: I NEVER read 50 Shades of Grey.  Yep, I just googled it and realized it is 40 Shades of GrEy, not GrAy. See, I know NOTHING about these books.  According to Wikipedia it is a trilogy, and has sold over 100 million copies worldwide.

Photo credit: www.brandsandfilms.com
Photo credit: www.brandsandfilms.com

I know that many of my friends have read these books.  Lots of giggles as they sat around talking about the books.  And hushed tones at certain parts of the conversation.

Interestingly, according to some articles I read this book’s fan base is primarily heterosexual married women over the age of 30. Hmmm, so what does that say?  Do married women harbor a secret desire to be dominated?

Do they harbor a secret desire for a handsome young entrepreneur to sweep them off their feet after making them sign a waiver?

Now I am just as interested in soft porn as the next gal.  I have read it, and am sure I will read it again.  I have read soft gay porn, and soft hetero porn.  Porn is porn.  Porn is not bad.  Bad porn is bad.  Good porn is not bad.  (I have NEVER written the word porn so much in one paragraph in my life.)

I suppose one of the reasons I have never read this series is the female lead character.  After reading the Twilight Series I promised myself I would never again read a series of books where the lead female character was weak, and simpering, and pining for her man, unable to take care of herself without him next to her.

And just to be clear I am on Team Jacob!  Jacob is warm and wolfy, and a beautiful Native American with history and culture.

Edward is a tool.  Cold, hard, pale, selfish…….. need I say more?

But I digress.

Please correct me if I am mistaken, but from what I understand the lead female character in these books is an awkward virgin who is self conscious and unsure of herself.  She is an easy target for this rich and  powerful man to control.  He wouldn’t need to ask her to submit, it seems as though that is built in to her nature. In fact, I heard from people who read the book that he ignored her use of her “safe” word on at least one occasion.  Now I have nothing against BDSM, and the way I understand it BDSM is all about trust, which is the whole reason for the safe word to exist in the first place. If he ignored her safe word, that just goes against everything about proper BDSM sex.  Also, the power differential in the relationship between the main characters is abusive in my opinion.  Whenever one person has the majority of power it is problematic. The man totally dominates this relationship.  That is no bueno.

So a couple of years ago all I heard about was these books and how I need to read them. I was told they are “so good”…..ummm, I’ll pass thanks.

Now all I hear about is the movie.  How it needs to be a “girls’ night”.  Go to dinner, then see the movie together.  I will skip that event.

My girlfriends were able to talk me into seeing “Magic Mike” (Tinkerbell is a HUGE Channing Tatum fan and she said I would like it). I did like it actually.  I am a Matthew McConaughey fan, and I just think he is sexy as heck…..however, I will not be talked into seeing this one.

So I suppose after Feb 2015, I will have to endure my friends giggling and speaking in hushed voices again (especially if the children or husbands are around) with pauses in the conversation to look up and see who might be in the room listening.